LOST VALUES

Each morning I wake up and have a brief look at Facebook and twitter. Twitter has a lot of rubbish on it I'm not interested in.

Facebook is a bit more selective, a mixture of happy silly things animals do although I didn't like the one about cats knocking over small children. No didn't get that one.    And then there is the rant about Brexit and about how everyone who voted out is stupid, ignorant, bigoted, selfish and racist, unaware of the greater good and the darker evil that lurks in all the media to manipulate hearts and minds.  And how all those who chose to Remain are elitist evangelistic intellectuals who are untrustworthy, arrogant, deceitful, sociopathic liars, who are emotionally dysfunctional with bullying mothers and are fearful of losing all their money because that is the only thing that holds them together.  

We have politicians who have shown themselves to be self absorbed cowards (although we knew that already, didn't we?), and probably into the dark net more than those they monitor, and who are arguing against each other and vindictive, irresponsible media who are mis quoting, misrepresenting and turning every positive into a negative and trying to find a lot more of their own.

Combined with this, you have baby boomers who are wondering what their life is all about, trying to find their inner child when they should be finding their inner grown up, and if they have wasted their life so far on the accumulation of money and stuff (short answer - you have).   And haven't focused on what is really important and have valued that are completely screwed (short answer - if you focused on accumulation of money and stuff - you have).

Counsellors, psychologists, healer, yoga classes have waiting lists because everyone is stressed and stressed people are easy to manipulate and they desperately feel out of control because they never had it in the first place.

Then you have the woo woos, who are the other group of evangelists, you tell us we have to be kind to each other and kindness is catching (there's a survey out today saying that is true. Really, you needed a survey to show that did you?).  But they have a sanctimonious air about them as though they are full of the holy spirit and despite preaching rising above ego, are all high church.    And they tell us to stop doing something which has been ingrained since childhood through social conditioning which is extremely difficult to get rid of.    It is not that easy.   And then they tell us they know its not that easy but its a bit like being told how to give birth by someone who has never given birth. Every experience is different.

Stop.

Stand back and realise that everyone has a point. Both sides have a right side and that the good from both sides should be addressed. There is good and bad in everything.  The remain side had a point and the leaver side had a point.    EU was a bad marriage.   It was a bad marriage.   Both sides need to work on themselves and both sides weren't prepared to.    There was a striking lack of maturity in how all this has been dealt with.  I know the media dumb down things so that the masses are able to understand things, but by simplifying things to such an extent they made a very complicated relationship seem one of black and white 'economy vs immigration' right and wrongs, and like every relationship, its not that simple.  Culture and nature and values and use of language are complex and can not be decided on with a 'yes and a no'.   A bit like friends only getting one side of the story on which to base their advice, and not getting the whole story.   No side told the whole story and the one who could (the media) was the last person one should trust.    

Then there was petulant behaviour from politicians who are unworthy of the people they serve.    I don't know if it is just how its being reported by the media but my analogy to playground politics is really quite accurate.  One boy doesn't like another boy so he won't play with him.  One politician doesn't like another politician so he won't vote for him.  

We tried to make the marriage work.  We went to counselling and it couldn't be worked out because both sides have to make it want to work and if they don't, it won't.

One side won't give up - the remainers.    The leavers would not either if they had lost.   But rather than just being constructive about it, and realising we have to think long term (as in two years which is a forever in this short sighted, must have world), we are panicking.

There are a lot of voices of doom and gloom.   There are very few voices of balanced reason out there, who are not resorting to emotional rhetoric.    I can't hear many of them.  Even those names in journalism I have long respected are sounding armageddon.   As though the end of the world is nigh.

It is not. Just this warped world of warped values is crumbling and that is a good thing. The dead wood has been too long held up by the fresh wood and the dead wood has to go.   It is only held together by the systems that have long been broken.    Of course, it will want to take the rest of us with it, and it won't go without a fight, but go it will.  And that makes them even more afraid and needy.    Hence the aggression and anger and fighting and rubbish that is being printed in the media that passes for balanced commentary.

What it has shown me is to what extent people are afraid and greedy.   People I know who I thought would have more substance.   This is the only thing I have found shocking.  I don't care about the people I don't know. Who are mere names in a paper. They are PR constructs and I don't have a clue who they are.   I'm not sure they do.   I'm shocked by those I know.    I thought people would have more courage and more compassion.   When we change our values we change our perspective.   We tell our children kindness is paramount but we do not show it in how we behave or how we are communicating with one another now.  

I think we will be fine.  Because in divorce, you find out who your real friends are and you go as low as you can go.   And then, you rebuild your self and find out what you are really made of.    Just that those who lack substance are finding out just that.   That they lack substance.     I do not believe we have hit rock bottom yet.    It is only then we will identify what is of value.  Because most of us have forgotten.