YUKONIC ANGEL WITH A FLAT TYRE

I went to an event at St Paul's last night. Following the wonderful trip to the Yukon, the Yukon province (or their PR) organised an event to bring together some of the partners they would like to work with in the UK.   The Yukon is a phenomenal place. As the world seems to be going through it's own mid life crisis - not just the 40 somethings - it's a needed tonic to get people grounded and back to what is really important.  And sorry, who's in the next series of Strictly Come Dancing ain't it.

After doing star jumps in St Pauls so I sort of looked like a lop sided fuzzy angel, (see pix)   I sat next to the Honorable Darrell Pasloski, the Province Premier and Jonas Smith , his Executive Assistant.   It could have been a very serious evening, but Yukoners are story tellers.  I told them about how when I was first told about Dall sheep (indigenous to Kluane National Park, long curly horns, stick to vertical slopes as though they are stuck with super glue) I thought they were called Dull sheep - as in boring.  This seemed logical to me, as the Yukoners weren't averse to calling mountains and lakes disappointing or disenchanted, so I felt it just flowed with the general malaise of the place.     I wondered if we could have the same in the UK, it would make things so much more entertaining.   Like 'bling crescent',  'wannabe gardens', 'philanderers walk', 'slut street' and 'emotional fuckwit avenue'.  Everywhere knows where they live, it would just be nice to make sure others did as well.  Anyway, after telling my stories (which I have many in the Yukon) Jonas told me one about a helicopter pilot called Doug. Doug was a man of few words but he is the best in the Yukon if not the world. There is nothing he can't do with his helicopter.    He has saved lives and made people's days with his acrobatics and fifteen years ago our film crew flew with him in a canyon to meet a group who were kayaking along the Alsek River.   Our American director who was very can do, asked him to 'show us what he'd got'.   Doug glanced at him and did precisely that. The sound man nearly threw up, the cameraman, although had never been in Vietnam said he knew those who had and it wasn't dissimilar and I screamed that I was pregnant (which I was).  Doug calmly placed us down on dry land and we didn't speak to the director for the next few hours.

Jonas told me a story about Doug.  He was asked to take Hilary Clinton for a ride.   There were security guards all over the place.    He had been nigh on strip searched as had his helicopter.   So satisfied he and Hilary and as many security guards they could pack in the helicopter took off.   All was going smoothly. Everyone was happy. Doug turned to security guard.   "You know you checked my bag for ammunition?"   The security guard said 'yes'.   And in here (pointing to all the nooks and crannies in the cabin) for guns and explosives?"    The security guard replied 'yes'.    "Well, you see here this stick. What happens I point this in this direction and we go crashing into the mountain. What you gonna do then huh?"  It was funny at the time.

Oh, yes and my tyre burst and it costs a fortune to replace those go flat tyres..for whoever wants to know.....