Monday, 8 July 2013

YEAHHHHHH I'VE PASSED - and a day out in the country...

ROLLER COASTER or what. I received an email saying I've passed my yoga exam.   I am so happy I squeaked when I read the email. Know I've still got a long way to go but it's a step in the right direction and it was a big one (for me).

What else I do today?  I've been at the Hampton Court Flower Show today. The traffic was appalling, but the parking was easy.  The Country Living tent I find intimidating and a bit depressing.  The women owning their own businesses and setting up their stands today all smelt fragrant, looked thoroughly well bred, fine high cheek boned emaciation or English rose hamster cheek features, but their steely blue eyes and thin mouths suggested they are as hard as the proverbial nails and I wouldn't want any of them as friends let alone enemies.   The men all look wonderfully weathered like fine garden furniture although slightly embittered as though they're married to the fine high cheek boned types and haven't had sex for ages - well not with their wives anyway. It's therefore very reassuring to know I'm not a Country Living type, do not want to live my life in linen, alpaca or cashmere throws nor fill my home with £10 scented candles or bits of stick stuck in perfume, nor fill my cupboards with chutneys of every reincarnation, consistency and colour imaginable.  Superficial expensive nonsense filling empty lives - that's probably why I found it depressing.     As I wandered round they did glance at me and we both instantly recognised I do not belong. Thank fuck for that.  

Out of Country Living, a jug of Pimms selling for £22, sandwiches at £6, and no one would tell me what they were charging for a strawberry. Some guy was dressed as Santa Claus, two others as very large birds of paradise (the plant not the bird) and there was a famous chef (didn't recognise him) telling about fifteen housewife types (dressed in linen smelling of scented candle) how to understand a pig.   Yup, they were his words.

There was a stand showing you how you can breed and keep chickens, grow your own herb garden and I met a moustached guy I'd chatted to in Chelsea Flower Show. Deborah Meaden was there again speaking very loudly into her mobile phone, wearing something floral again.  There was a list of celebrities who attended or will attend. Kate Humble was speaking.  All the names on the list were the same names at the Chelsea Flower Show.   They probably have a rose named after them.

Felt desperately sorry for the guy at the Chocolate Fusion stand (handmade in Wales  as all his truffles were melting and he was giving them away for free.    He wouldn't charge. If you go, go buy his chocolate. He's on the same tent where the guy is asking you to understand pigs.   There was also a stand selling curries in the corner which if it had been a normal English summer would have been perfect but the guy was very sweet and told me 'my mum makes them all'

Korean stand has fans to give away (you are going to need them!), Spanish stand gives free compasses so you can literally get your bearings...and you can see the butterfly garden which is phenomenal but I had to fly off myself as I had a deadline to meet. This isn't Chelsea Wives, it's suburban housewives.  Frustrated suburban housewives. should have a stand there.....


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